This blog has moved

This blog is now located at http://bramerspace.blogspot.com/.
You will be automatically redirected in 30 seconds, or you may click here.

For feed subscribers, please update your feed subscriptions to
http://bramerspace.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default.

Superbowl 2010

Wow, what a game. Enjoying a beer at 7.45 am, at our age, well, it is interesting! Had to rush Natalie off to school so I could be on the 100 that would be allowed in to the Big Bamboo bar. So excited for Manning, but it was not meant to be. Wanted to say more, but a bit shell shocked that the Indy defense just looked that bad in the 2nd half. Oh well, a boiler won, so that is good!

Songs That Make Me Cry

Ok, you're not going to see this kind of crap from me very often. But, Angie Fanset inspired me to think about what songs can make me cry. Really. These are songs that I listen to when I am sad/mad and want to stay that way. Sometimes I feel better, sometimes not. Enjoy!

Holding Back The Years
Simply Red
This song is one of my all-time favorites. It can make me cry if I am sad or smile if I am happy.

Fast Car
Tracy Chapman
This song made me feel less alone in dealing…

Dust In The Wind
Kansas
I had this song stuck in my head when my grandmother died.

I hope you dance
Lee Ann Womack
Our hope for Natalie when she grows up

Natale's Song
Sia
The title made it special. The lyrics made it good.

The Luckiest
Ben Folds
The part about the old man next door makes me cry every time.

Bitter End
Dixie Chicks
Song we used for our goodbye party in the US before coming to China

Drive
The Cars
Tom and I broke up one time. This was the song I used to cry myself to thinking about losing him.

My Own Prison
Creed
I just love this song and the beat really feels like a pounding heart.

Still Loving You
Scorpions
One of my first hard rock songs and it became after an early "lost love". Gotta love self-pity!

Father And Daughter
Paul Simon
The song is just beautiful and makes me sad to think Natalie will be gone soon.

Suds In The Bucket
Sara Evans
I know this is upbeat, but this is such a strong song of independence.

Hurt
Johnny Cash
This is a great version of the Trent Rezner (Nine Inch Nails) song. Cash makes every song a cryer!

What Kind of Fool
Barbra Streisand
Wow, no good explanation. But it was my favorite song to listen to when my parents were getting a divorce.

Building A Mystery
Sarah McLachlan
Remindes me that building walls around myself was not going to protect me.

You're Still the One
Shania Twain
I think of this every anniversary (well the last 10 anyway!)

One Tin Soldier - The Legend of Billy Jack
Coven
Ok, who can listen to this song and NOT cry?

Tears in Heaven
Eric Clapton
I think of the sorrow he must have felt when he wrote this.

Run, Baby, Run
Sheryl Crow
Describes how hard you have to work at life sometimes.

Here You Come Again
Dolly Parton
Taught me that some people will always try to keep you down.

Trouble With Growth

I had a conversation in the office on Wednesday that I will simply label as odd.

Every employee received a free pass to the Expo http://en.expo2010.cn/participation/pop/moren.htm to be held in Shanghai in 2010. The Expo is a huge event - China expects 70 million visitors for it. Our employees received this perk from their union.

As I was looking at the ticket, I noticed the mascot for the Expo. As been noted by several people, the mascot, Haibao, looks like Gumby from Saturday Night Live fame.

I asked the employees what they thought of the mascot. Their responses were mixed but led into a discussion as to the definition of the word mascot. It is hard for me to define mascot. It is hard to describe in a sense that they would understand but that is not the point of this blog.

I told them that this mascot looked very similar to a character on TV in the States. They immediately shouted, “Yes, we know that”. They said this character was on the TV show “Growing Pains” – the sitcom from the 1980’s. I had mentioned previously on a facebook posting about China’s fascination with this sitcom.

I questioned that this character was ever on “Growing Pains” which led into a 5 minute discussion to ensure that I was thinking of the correct show – remember in China, this show is translated to “Trouble with Growth”. It took a while to make the connection of "trouble with Growth" to the actual title of "Growing pains"

After all parties knew that I understood that they were talking about “Growing Pains”, I said that this character was not in that show. They quickly jumped to the Internet and pulled up these pictures.

Well I have to admit, Gumby was on the show but I am shocked that they noticed this. How many times do you notice posters hanging in a scene from "CSI: Miami" or any other show?

(Another funny note – As I typed this at lunch on Thursday, my admin was looking over my shoulder and saw the word Haibao. She wasn’t here yesterday so she wasn’t part of the group discussion. I asked her if she knew it looked like Gumby. She said yes as she saw it on the TV show “Growing Pains”. I threw my hands up in utter amazement. Does everyone in this country watch “Growing Pains” in deep detail?)

After my amazement, we had several small discussions. They thought their mascot looked healthier because it was bigger. One guy thought that the American’s stole the idea for Gumby from China but I explained to him that Gumby was from the 80’s and Haibao was less than 5 years old.

This country and its people never cease to amaze me.

Tom – Don’t flatter yourself!

Today, I returned to the office after a 28 day absence. I was met with a lukewarm reception. Everyone said hello but nobody stopped in my office to have a conversation. People of other functions would walk by my office and peak in but no one ever said anything. I just thought people were giving me some respect in order for me to catch-up with organizing my work due to my absence. WRONG! The truth finally came out during lunch. As I was standing in line, I noticed several members of my staff were in line if front of me. I thought I would initiate the conversation and moved forward and said hello to everyone. One of the girls actually said hello as she backed away. I thought it was odd. Obviously, they didn’t want to engage in conversation so I went back in line where I had left my admin. My admin laughed and said that they were afraid to talk to me as they were not wearing their surgical masks. LIGHTENING STRIKE! It turns out that everyone is afraid I am carrying the swine flu since I was in the States for a month.

What an odd homecoming!

McDonalds Drive-thru

This will be hard to visualize unless you have a good imagination – some effort on your part will be required

Today, my wife was in Beijing. I was out late last night. My daughter was out late as well. Needless to say I was running late getting my daughter to the bus and getting myself on the road to work. Breakfast was just not available to be had this morning.

I decided to treat myself to a Chinese McDonalds. There is a McDonalds near where I work which happens to be the first McDonalds in China with a drive-thru window. I have never used it because I don’t drive and I wouldn’t be able to tell my driver what to order. Now picture in your head the way you and your family goes through the drive-thru. You’re leaning out the window ordering while each family member barks out their order and you repeat it into the speaker. That scenario won’t happen in my van due to the language barrier.

Today I went to the counter and as I was ordering I noticed something odd at the drive-thru window. Again, I need to preface and say the design of the drive-thru’s are slightly different in China but it has the same concept; Order at the end of the building – drive to the first window to pay (but here it is always closed) – drive to the second window to pick-up. The pick up window is huge. The window is probably 12 feet wide and about 6 feet tall. It goes from the floor to the ceiling – when you look out you can see the entire vehicle: top to bottom - front to back.

Well, the thing I saw today was an expat paying, talking, and picking up his food from the back of the van. The oddity was that he had the sliding door of his van open and he was conducting this transaction from the captain’s chair of his van. It just looked so odd to see the inside of a van completely exposed at the drive-thru window. He looked like a king (a fat one at that) sitting in his carriage atop the men’s shoulders who were carrying him.

Oh, how I wish I had a camera

The Discovery Channel from a 6-year old's Perspective

The other night, Natalie was watching the Discovery Channel and asked me for a pad a paper to take notes with. I am not exactly sure what the topic was on that particular show, it was something about your body and dreams. Here are her notes from the other night, mispellings and all:

• Body made of water
• Conection between penceil and soil
• Find zink in bateres (there is a picture of a battery on the notepad)
• We have to sleep or else we could die
• While we sleep our body does tasks
• You have forgoten stuff when you are busy, but when you sleep, you rember because you are to focused what you are doing when you do work

I think the last one is a good for all of us to remember!

I may have some issues when I return to the U.S.

Stolen from Rupert Pupkin – Shanghai Talk March 2009

Expatriate executives now live in constant fear of repatriation. And just as orientation companies popped up a decade ago to help them adjust to life in China, a new industry has sprung up around reverse migration. Psychologists and relocation experts are standing up to help executives and their families re-adjust to life in the West. The following illustrates some challenges faced by expat executives when the day comes to kiss the Buddha goodbye.

1) The Marriage Afterward
It is not uncommon for the repatriated executive to feel a deep sense of marital dissatisfaction upon his return to the West. He will frequently daydream about the attentive and attractive young women he came into contact with here, and how his life might’ve turned out differently had he run off with the tall one who liked to role-play. A cache of exotic downloaded images in his computer (deceptively titled “TaxForms.doc.07”) provides some solace until his wife discovers it and forces him into therapy. He stays in the marriage for the sake of the kids, but he’s rarely at home, preferring instead a back booth at a local Chinese restaurant where he does crosswords and flirts with the Fujianese waitress.
2) Relations with Friends
After expressing initial interest in his tales from the East, friends grow weary of his almost constant reference to bai jiu and how much of it he consumed at official banquets. Similarly, old acquaintances find it odd that a man of his age constantly text messages. When he wrestles with a friend to prevent him from paying a restaurant check, he is stunned when the friend readily concedes. When the neighbors invite him over for coffee, he averts his eyes and thinks they’re up to something. Close friends, concerned about his depression, suggest he start a support group for other recovering expatriates who can sit around sharing the pain of losing their mini-van drivers.
3) Pharmacy Visits
Upon entering a pharmacy at home, the re-pat starts to feel anxious and apprehensive. The absence of unfriendly middle-aged women in white smocks is enough to unnerve any old China hand. The sheer variety of products makes him dizzy and he begins to titter nervously in the deodorant section. He is astounded at the convenience of being able to pay for purchases without having to seek out a cashier in another part of the store.
4) Golf Withdrawal
As he sits in his den staring out the window, idling away the unemployed hours, his thoughts often turn to golf. His eyes get misty as he recalls his caddy, a four foot tall provincial woman, head wrapped in a sun bonnet, who washed his balls. His limbs begin to spasm involuntarily as he recalls one glorious day when he prevailed over a particularly arrogant Taiwanese client. His set of fake Callaway clubs is slumped in the corner waiting to be sold at a yard sale.
5) Driving and Smoking Laws
Ignoring a voice in his head that suggests he find a regular parking space, the recently repatriated executive will drive onto the sidewalk in front of his destination and park two inches from the door. Though the car is not on an incline, he wrenches up the emergency brake. To get here, he has run three red lights, raced through a school zone, and sent scores of text messages. If he is stopped by police, he will inform them that he has guanxi with the deputy mayor. They will arrest him. He is not unknown to the police; since his return, he has been detained 19 times for smoking in restaurants. During the detentions, he rants about the lack of personal freedom in the West. He forces cigarettes on everyone he meets and brags about how much they cost.
6) Phantom Aches
Though in fine physical shape, the returnee will experience mysterious body aches. During these episodes his muscles will spasms and he may even get a painful and involuntary erection. Physiotherapists believe that the condition is related to the sudden cessation of oil massages
7) Feelings, Honesty, Human Interactions
Accustomed to suppressing his true feelings, the re-pat finds himself at a disadvantage in a society obsessed with emotional health. Everywhere he turns, people are outing themselves, laughing about their character defects, broadcasting their most intimate thoughts on Television. He is embarrassed for them. When a gas station attendant asks how he is doing, he sees it as a rhetorical question and he grunts. When strangers smile at him on the street, he grimaces and quickens his pace. At job interviews, he sits modestly with his hands in his lap until he is dismissed as a dullard.
8) Saving and Losing Face
At a dinner party with friends, his wife, who by now is in secret talks with a divorce lawyer, recounts an embarrassing story about her husband’s irritable bowel. He recoils in terror. He has completely lost his ability to poke fun at himself and sulks like a child. When his young son forgets his lines in a school play, he slips into the parking lot for a smoke rather than face the other parents. When loudly informed by a bank teller that his account is in negative territory, he smiles and thanks her profusely while pretending to place a wad of imaginary cash in his breast pockets for the benefit of those in line behind him.

It can take many years to re-adjust to life in the West. Some never regain their ability to tip. Others struggle with odd cravings for stinky tofu. But over time the re-pat recovers and goes on to live a productive life, though he may never quite shake the feeling that part of his soul remains in the East.

Run away from the naked American

This weekend, I had a reminder of a funny situation that I was involved with a few months ago.

Earlier this winter I was using our clubhouse’s sauna. I usually prefer the steam room but it had been broken for several months (but that is a different story for a different time). I, unlike many of the natives, prefer to wear a swimsuit when I am in the sauna or steam room. This particular day, I was just relaxing in the sauna trying to get it really hot. I was standing by the coals pouring water on them to generate the dry heat. I was alone in the sauna. Both the sauna and the showers are in a separate space from the lockers. I heard a knock on the outside of the locker room door and a lady’s voice asking if anyone was in the locker room (loosely translated from Chinese). I realized it was the ayi (ayi’s do the cleaning) coming in to dump the waste baskets and mop the floor. Well, I didn’t respond because I was in the separate room and I was wearing shorts. About 20 seconds later she enters the sauna area and she sees me in the sauna. She said something in embarrassment and quickly departed the locker room. And I do mean quickly, she physically ran from the locker room. I laughed to myself and thought that Management must have instructed her to never be in the room when guests are present.

Now fast forward 20 minutes. I have alternated between the sauna and the hot tub. Very relaxing! By this time, there is now an Asian man – naked – in the sauna with me. He leaves the sauna and is standing in the room cooling off – again naked. About this time the ayi has entered the locker room to complete her task that she tried earlier. She probably assumed that I would be gone by now. Anyway, she walks into the sauna room where I am in the sauna and the Asian man is still standing – still naked. Now, instead of shrieking and running from the locker room due to the presence of a guest, she stands there and has about a 5 minute conversation with the man who just stand there bare-butt naked without even a towel.

It was so odd or I should say, their behavior was so odd. She sees the American (dressed) and runs. She sees the Asian (naked) and stops and has a conversation.

I now assume that she has been instructed not be around a Westerner in this type of situation. As far as the Asian, standing there naked in front of an ayi is no problem but I guarantee you that if it was a person of a higher class than an ayi then he would have run or covered up.

People kind of get use to having the ayis being around in the most personal situations. At work, we have female ayis who practically live in the restrooms cleaning. At first, I was very reluctant to use the facilities when they were present. Now, it is no issue to be using the urinal while the ayi cleans the next urinal over. I have even gotten to a point where I have simple conversations with them in Chinese while I am using the urinal.

I think I have graduated and am ready to try a bath house.

Girl's Night Out

Last night was the Daddy Daughter Dance for girl scouts, so I had a free pass to go out. Four of us decided to head down to the Promenade on Pudong side of the river. We went to Binjiang 1 and had a wonderful meal and good New Zealand Pinot Noir. For the first time in several weeks, it turned out to be a clear night. So we enjoyed the view of the river and all of the boat traffic moving around in the water.

After our fantastic dinner we headed over the Shanghai World Financial Center, the 2nd tallest building in the world. it was my first visit there and I must admit that I was a bit underwhelmed. Our plan was to go up to the bar area on the 93 floor. The bar is a part of the Park Hyatt, which occupies most of the top floors of the building, not sure how many. The entrance to building, which is adjacent to the entrance for the observation tower, is very nondescript. In fact, it was difficult to know if we were going the right way. Of course the two bottles of wine at dinner could have attributed to that problem. But the whole is building is ultra modern, which apparently translates to "make it difficult for simple folk to find us". But we did find an elevator, which took us to the 91 floor, where the hotel check-in is. From there we took another elevator which went to the 92 floor and headed to the Century 100 Bar. However, there was a 400RMB/person charge for a table at a window. What a crock! We decided the view from the bar was OK for us. There was a band playing, so it seemed like it would be fun. Unfortunately it appeared the band was some reject from the US, with the female singer singing rock songs like they were Jazz standards. I do not usually associate The Police "Every step you take" as a normal Jazz song. The crowd was an interesting mix of traveling business men and rich Chinese couples out for a drink and some live music. Oh, and us! While we were sitting at the bar we noticed some crazy tall drink glasses which seemed out of place in such a nice place. Would have more at home at a bar with "Yard of Beer" night. We stayed until 11 so we could get our free drink which they served us in the crazy tall glass. It was a strawberry something and very tasty. Even better was that it was free. Plus the bar tender told us to come back on ladies night when the drinks are more affordable!

After our drinks, we decided to head home. At the main entry, we had to mess with the strange sculpture that decorated the wall near the elevators. Three things reaching out from the wall was too funny for us to take a usual picture. Yes, that is me giving one a kiss on the head. Weird...

But we had a lot of laughs and as always, it is good to have lots of girl talk. So, until the next night away, I toast Kathy, Kathy, and Angie with a big "I love you guys..."

Natalie Loses Her First Tooth

Well, it finally happened. Natalie's loose tooth came out today at school. She got bumped in the mouth by another student and VOILA it fell out! It surprised me today when my cell phone rang at 5:02. She had brownies after school and she is usually not home on brownie day until 5:20. She had rushed home to tell me about some good news and bad news. The good news was that she had lost her tooth. The bad news was that she had lost it! Somewhere along the way, she had misplaced it and it did not make it home. But, she had a plan! She was going to write a letter to the tooth fairy and explain what happened. She was calling to tell me that I HAD to print it for as soon as I got home! Funny little girl.

When I got home around 6.30, she had written the note already. I guess she had decided she couldn't trust the computer! Dad had printed a couple of the pictures that I have added here. She placed the note and the pictures upstairs on her nightstand along with her Tooth Fairy box (she got this special box from the Tooth Fairy when she was born so that she did not have to put teeth under her pillow!). We placed a teeny tiny note in the box to direct the Tooth Fairy to the note which explains why there is not tooth tonight! Lots of work for a bit of money!

She and I talked about how losing a tooth is "bittersweet" for a parent. Her Gammaw explained the "bittersweet" concept this summer to her. So she understands that while it was her "best thing" of the day, it was both my "best thing" and my "worst thing". Because it means she is in fact growing up. She looks so grown-up with the tooth missing!

Well, I better go and see of the Tooth Fairy made it here already...

Natalie's Basketball Experience - Early Season

Natalie is playing in a basketball league this winter. She is a member of the Nuggets and wearing #3. There are only a few girls in this league and Natalie is youngest and smallest on her team. But, we are just proud to have her out there. Up to now they have played 4 games, won 3 and lost 1.

She has only taken about 4 practice shots, and then only because the coach made her. She prefers to dribble and stays away from the ball if possible. She likes to spend most of her hiding behind her team mates. But we are really proud of how she goes out there and plays.

There are huge differences in the levels of play, even at this level. There are some kids that clearly have been playing for a while. They can dribble and shoot into the basket, even at the regular height. And there are a few who appear to not have touched the ball much.

And just like any other kids league in any other part of the world, we have parents who appear to be extra involved with their child's playing ability. It seems especially emphasized by the international mix of kids.

Anyway, enjoy the clips. And we placed a few videos out on You Tube. More to come as the season progresses...