Daily Picture Grade 4 - Day 64

"Geesh, Mom should have cleaned these glasses!"

Look how dirty those glasses are! What kind of mother let's her child out of the house not being able to see! Oh, well, maybe I should add that it's probably not dirt, they are probably dried tears. Yup. Last night was not an "eat sushi" kind of night (that is how she now refers to our best girl's only evenings!). You might recall that she lost all of her electronic privileges more than a week ago. This was due to a lack of responsibility which resulted in her forgetting homework, etc. The weekend was painful though we did sneak in a move (Back to the future) and she checked her email a few times. So this week was gonna be better, right? Unfortunately for her and I, it has not turned out that way. Monday, she remembered homework but chose not to write it into her responsibility (AKA homework) journal. I let that slide for the day, but insisted no privileges back until she learned how to write down her homework and check it before she left school. Tuesday morning. I wrote two thing in her responsibility journal: 1) Remember to get Vest (she forgot it Friday it Monday) 2) Turn in the t shirt envelope to Ms. Pineda. As I packed her lunch, I wrote a cute note on a sticky note (yes, I do that sometimes) and added the same two reminders to it. I am such a good mom-helper!


Fast forward to Tuesday night. I picked her up at school after band practice and asked her before she left school if she had all of her homework. I suggested she look at the responsibility hournal before we left the school so we could run up to the classroom if she forgot. 
Natalie: We don't have to do that as I already checked.
Me: Why don't I just check the journal real quick?
Natalie: Mon, I didn't write anything down as I only had one math home link to do.
Me: Hmmm... The agreement was that you write things down so you can establish a good habit. I see you have your vest, that's good. Let's go home.
So we got out homework at home and I relayed again the importance of writing the stuff down. Pretty sure she thought that Charlie Brown's teacher was talking! Then I opened the backpack, just to be sure nothing was left. And behold. I. Found. The. Damn. Envelope. Somehow, even with verbal and written reminders, she forgot to give to her teacher! Grrr... Just so you don't judge my next reaction too harshly, please be aware that up to this point I had used calm voice mom to explain that she could not have any electronic privileges back until she wrote in the responsibility journal. That brought some tears, but they seemed more for effect. Judge this: holding the undelivered envelope after I spent an hour being patient sort of sent me into a ... well, let's call it a spin.
Me: Why is this letter in here?
Natalie: I didn't have time to deliver it.
Me: In the whole day today, you didn't have 30 seconds to give to your teacher?
Natalie: Mom, I am really busy, no I didn't have time.
Me: Now I am pissed.
Yes, I used a curse word. And if you have been following my blog you know that cursing is currently causing  Natalie all sorts of conflicting emotions. The impact was immediate and she burst out in real crying. Which is not awesome to have in the background while you are cooking dinner. Needless to say, dinner was quiet. It was also bath night, which added to the wonderfulness of being a parent. Though she did decide to sleep in my bed anyway. She left a note on my side which said: "I feel ASHAMED. I am sorry." That didn't make me feel any better. I was just glad to get her in bed. Guess I should have cleaned those glasses off before I also went to bed. For Karma reasons. Really. Because at 1:23 a.m. Natalie woke me up
Natalie: Mom, I'm thirsty. 
Me: Well, go down and get some water.
Natalie: I can't.
Me: Why?
Natalie: Because I am afraid. Can you please go down and get me some?
So, the reality is that she is still 9. Still afraid of the dark. Still needs her mom to help with some things. Still not quite as responsible as she will be when she grows up. Still my daughter.
I should have cleaned the glasses.