US pavilion Ambassador

Great article about the US student ambassadors working at the US pavilion. We are hosting an ambassador while he is here working. This article gives some insights into what they do all day. Also makes you feel proud!

Is This the Craziest Bridge Ever Designed?

Never thought about how to connect two countries where they drive on different sides of the road! Not sure I would want to be on during typhoon season though!

[Is This the Craziest Bridge Ever Designed?]

Dinner with Ayi

First of all, before describing the events of last night, let me explain the term Ayi. Ayi literally means "Aunt" in Mandarin. But is used generally as a term of respect for any Chinese woman older than yourself who you don't know by name. To make it more complicated though, Ayi is the general nomenclature used to describe domestic help. We don't use the term "maid", there is no such word in Mandarin really. So our world is filled with Ayi's: cleaning our street, monitors on the school bus, and term we use for Zhang Cai Zhen who comes to our house every week day and adores Natalie. So why not an English name like Jenny or Sally like other Ayi's use? She doesn't have an English name and never felt compelled to adopt one. SO why not call her Zhang Cai Zhen? First reason is that Zhang Cai Zhen contains 'zh' and 'c' which are the hardest sounds (characters) to pronounce. Secondly, she prefers Ayi! OK, got it?

Ayi's son  is getting married on June 19. In actuality, they are already married. (see picture with Natalie to the right) June 19 is simply the wedding. It is common for Chinese couples to do this. [It is actually interesting to compare and contrast the differences between a religious-based marriage versus a "cultural-based" one. I quoted that as I am not really sure how to refer to the Chinese practices for taking on a partner. But that is another blog for another day!] Unfortunately, Natalie and I will both be in the U.S. for summer holiday on that day. Ayi originally wanted us to change our flights, it is that important to her. But after she and I discussed, we compromised. Tom would represent the Bramer's at the wedding and we would all go to dinner before hand. So why is this so important? For Ayi and her family, we are a major source of income. Her husband is only working part-time due to a heart condition. Her son does have a good job, but he probably makes the same only by working many more hours. When we first hired her, she was still paying of significant medical bills for surgery her son had two years earlier. So, we are treated with utmost respect from both the groom and bride's family. I find that totally embarrassing. It feels like this respect carries with it responsibilities for which we are not qualified to perform. Growing up at the bottom of the middle-class in the U.S. does not prepare you for the idea of another non-family person being dependent on you for their welfare. Capitalism usually puts a "human resource" structure in place to shield us from that at our jobs.

Last night we went to a local Shanghaise restaurant. There were to be nine of us in total, three from each family. As we pulled up in our chauffeured van, our guests were securing their bicycles out front. Awkward. We greeted each other, but there were no real introductions. It's like they know that foreigners cannot pronounce or remember names so they let us keep face by skipping that whole procedure. We headed into the resteraunt. It appeared that we might have been the ONLY foreigners ever to enter this place, we had a group of three escorts walk us up and into our private dining room. The first test was the seating arrangements. In Chinese culture, it is standard that the most important person should sit in the chair facing the door. We knew that it was probably going to be Tom, but he attempted to defer to the Ayi's son to show our respect. After about 2 minutes, they (we did not participate) worked out who should sit where. And yes, Tom became the "The Man".

Ah, now the menu! I was hoping for a restaurant where we could pre-order. Then we could have had some help to navigate the customs that might (or might not ) be associated with certain dishes. I made the Ayi help me and considering hoe much chatter she invoked while studying the menu, I am sure I would not have been successful by myself. After much debate, we agree to 6 cold dishes. One dish was a Sashimi combo, which probably offended all of them (they eat nothing that is not cooked!), but had to make sure Natalie had something to eat! Rest of the dishes were not too strange, some pork tongue, but everyone eats that, right?  Now to pick the main dishes. Our cold dishes all arrived before we finished ordering! We had 8 main dishes.   The choice was probably 8 or 88 as 8 is the lucky number for Chinese. Duck, eggplant with pork, beef with peppers, noodles, tofu with chicken, pig skin and pork, mushrooms and cauliflower, and baozi (of course). Tom was lucky enough to get the first choice of every dish. Natalie's plate was filled as everyone kept selecting choice bites and putting on her plate. I sat back and enjoyed. Each dish which was placed on the table introduced Chinese chatter about the good and bad points of that particular dish. I am still amazed at how a meal in a restaurant becomes a complete gastronomical debate!

As Ayi and I were ordering, Tom was asked to partake in the symbolic smoking of the peace pipe. In this case, a Zhong Nan Hai Liu Shui Yin, one of the post expensive brands of cigarettes you can buy! I couldn't take pictures as it seemed rude. But let me tell you, Tom is definitely not a smoker! He looked a bit like a girl puffing on it. Natalie was impressed though at his ability to make smoke come out his nose! She thought it was a trick and demanded another explanation this morning after breakfast. Later after eating, he smoked another. Still no good! Luckily the Baijiu drinking was not required last night. Anyway, he was picking up the bill, so I guess he earned the smokes!

The conversation was a bit limited. Our guests spoke mostly Shanghai-ise to each other, so it was hard to follow. Mostly the conversation revolved around Natalie and how beautiful she was. Seemed there was also some discussion about a child whose eye was almost poked out by another child with a chopstick. Guess that is the American "running with scissors" analogy.  Natalie thought the "father-in-law" was loud (see he and his wife with Natalie on the left). And he was, but in a funny way. He would yell out something in Mandarin (I think) to Natalie and she would respond "Wo bu jidao" which means "I don't know". This would make them all laugh. She didn't think it was very funny. Soon  it was time to pack up and head home. They gave us gifts, including a box of Lipton black tea, which Ayi uses to make iced tea for Tom every day. And lots of candy. Plus a set of soap dishes and towels for our bathroom.  Out total bill came to about 900RMB, about $131. Fed a group of 9. Not bad. Cheaper per person than a single entrée at Outback.

Overall it was a wonderful evening, though we all ate too much and a few of us smoked too much. Going out with local Chinese reminded me why I love China. The respect and love that they can give to even strangers who are not outsiders can be overwhelming to Americans. I sense that Natalie has an easier time accepting the attention and appreciation. She is still trusts that people do things for good reasons. As an adult, that is not always our first reaction. In fact, I am sure there are people who will read this blog and assume that we are being treated nicely only to ensure long-term future employment for one individual. But I am learning not to see it that way at all. It is simply true appreciation. Not a Hallmark card. Nothing insincere at all. One definition of appreciation is "a positive emotion or attitude in acknowledgment of a benefit that one has received or will receive". Isn't that we expect appreciation to be? So, thanks to Ayi and her family and friends for helping us experience such a great evening!

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BBQ Cabbage Slaw Recipe

Made slaw for a party yesterday and realized my old standby recipe for a good dressing had actually not been a recipe at all, it was the Marzeti Slaw Dressing you could buy in the states. No good for me here in Shanghai! So, I adapted a few recipes I use for other summer salads into one that could enhance the slaw. 

Nothing fancy here. Simple slaw and a sweet sour mayo dressing. But as I was putting it together, I spent some time thinking about what this slaw could become, if you made some minor modifications! So, I spent today playing with it and appreciate the versatility of a simple side dish like slaw. You know me, I rarely use a recipe as is, especially if it was not mine to begin with! So this is a perfect one to play with. The cayenne adds just a tiny kick. If you are worried about spice, leave it out, but I assure you, there is so little used here you will not taste spice!

The addition of raisins added another texture and really added some sweetness. That was probably my favorite variation. Adding the sesame oil and cilantro transformed it into the Asian style slaw that I normally serve alongside my Soy Lime chicken. Well, almost. I add peanuts to the slaw, but didn't like that as much with this version, so I left them out. This slaw would also be great on top of pulled pork sandwiches. Didn't try that yesterday, but I think it would be great. If you use it that way, I would go with more of a chop to the slaw to ensure you can easily consume from inside of a bun!

By the way, did you know that China produces 36,335,000 tonnes of cabbage each year? And there are so many types to choose for! Today I used simple green and purple cabbage, but there were lots of other choices. I think I will try a few others with this recipe. 

But some other day. I think I have had enough slaw for now!

iPad Exerience - Week 3

The iPad (not sure about ownership anymore!) is slowly finding its niche in our home. Don't read into that comment that I love the device yet, but I am thawing! And maybe it is because I knew that a tablet would fit into our computing gaps.

I love using it for email. My Gmail renders a bit different than in Chrome, but I find it easier to use than my Android phone for anything more than a quick check. Sure, using the smallish screen on my Hero is fine if I am checking to see who is bringing the cupcakes to the class party, but it is not easy to write more than three or four sentences of response. The other thing the tablet does is to make my email reading a more "casual" and I feel less pressured to respond to the big ones. I keep that for my morning email ritual. I also use it for perusing through my articles on Google Reader. I have a lot of sites I loke to take a look at occassionally and I find the ability to take the iPad out to the porch (with a glass of wine!) is a favorite thing to do now. Only complaint is the inability to read the iPad with any sunlight. Even our table umbrella doesn't always do the job!

The other thing we use if for is playing games and watching the occasional YouTube video. Plus guests who visit like to pick it up and play with it too. Still working on the NetFlix connection!

So, I guess we'll keep it...